I found this conversation from high school:
piccadilly bird: when i have my wedding, there’ll be none of that “repeat after me” stuff
piccadilly bird: or “i wrote my own vows” stuff
RDawg888: what will they be?
piccadilly bird: it’ll be the priest (or whoever) saying “you want to spend the rest of your life with this schmuck/controlling bitch, because even though they’re a schmuck/controlling bitch, you love them more than you can believe and intend to continue doing so?” and then the “i do’s” and then time for the vodka and fruit juice
That is like, 90% what my wedding ended up being like. I WIN!